Scarlet Stone

Lately, I’ve been sidetracked by furniture replacement adventures. In the process, I have ended up on a couple of wild goose chases. I like to shop on Facebook’s Marketplace to find good, used pieces of furniture, plus going on these junkets to pick up the pieces can be lots of fun, and also at times nerve wracking. I had been searching for a decent couch for a while, then located one south of Cloquet in Mahtowa. So, on the beautiful morning of April 27, son Keaton, my friend, the Horse Whisperer, and I hooked up a trailer to my Jeep and headed south with Keaton at the wheel.
All I knew about Mahtowa was that it was an exit on the way to Minneapolis after Gordy’s and pre-Tobies. We arrived at the rural destination using GPS and I was thrilled with the “good-as-new” tapestry patterned sofa that had belonged to the mother of the seller and was the traditional style I like. I also was given a full-size wooden spinning wheel that just happened to be sitting in the garage on its way to Goodwill. It reminded me of years’ past when I owned an Ashford wheel and used to card my own wool, spin yarn, and knit. I figured this one to be decoration only, so we put it in the trailer and drove off to eat at the local Mahtowa Tavern, where the sellers told us we’d find great food. Not only were the burgers excellent, but the adjacent building housed the charming TJ’s Country Store, where the owners make their own meat and the butcher himself owns the place. So between the three of us, we ended up with a tasty variety which has since proved to be worth another trip....with or without a furniture pick-up.
In early May, while again perusing Facebook Marketplace, I found a rocking chair and ottoman over in Grand Rapids, so a couple days later I motored over to pick it up. Luckily, it wouldn’t fit into my Jeep, and I discouraged the male seller from trying harder as I was not really impressed with the quality. I did an “awe shucks”... and blasted off to go shopping. Instead of spending my money on the chair, I sauntered into Bender’s shoes, a favorite regional store, and bought a pair of sensible leather sandals, which was just as delightful and thus prevented the trip from becoming a wild goose chase. On the way home I took my time, driving through many Iron Range towns I hadn’t visited in a long while: Bovey, Coleraine, and Marble. Gosh, I thought to myself, filming crews could really find great settings for creepy suspense movies on the Range because so many of the main streets of these once-bustling communities are vacated and often so dilapidated. It is sad, but that’s just the way things are I guess.
About a week later, again on FB Marketplace, fortune revealed an early American-style glider rocker with lots of spindles and a foot rest to match with lovely textured burgundy upholstery. I made arrangements to go pick it up in Proctor. Driving down highway 53, the seller notified me stating that she could meet me in the Duluth Mall parking lot by JC Penney to make things easier. “Eureka,” I exclaimed! More time to shop! As you may recall, my last shopping adventure in the cities was usurped by pending hotel charges, so away I went on this gifted opportunity! After a short wait, the chair lady pulled up next to me. Greetings and cash were exchanged, and I now had the chair with spindles abounding and unblemished upholstery.
Business aside, I went on my merry way to enjoy the day with a trip into the mall. I bee-lined to Art In The Alley, which is a favorite tiny boutique with colorful, free-spirited treasures. I had a great time, and I ended up purchasing tops as well as a pair of earrings.
Upon leaving, I looked into my purse for my phone and discovered it was missing. I had just used it to check my messages, so I surmised I had set it down somewhere while caught up in the festive vibes. I went back inside and notified the kind, elderly clerk who assisted in searching high and low with no success.
I left Duluth, very dismayed, surmising that the two people who had come into the shop found it and had taken it while I was distracted and trying on clothing. I felt frustrated, then angry at the suspected thieves, and at the same time thought, “you don’t know for sure that they took it, Scarlet.” As I drove north, I contemplated how my day had been so fun up until the loss of the phone.
In Oprah fashion, I countered any self-pity, remaining balanced...grateful for my home and family. I was on track emotionally...except for slight accusations of thievery directed at those two blurry strangers. “It’s just a thing, the loss isn’t life threatening, and it’s not the start of dementia...everyone loses stuff.”
Suddenly, I couldn’t remember for sure if I had phone insurance....this was more like dementia. I was agonizing over the possible expense and thought maybe I would just get a cheap Tracfone, and I also thought that not having the phone would free up so much of my time and that was a good thing.
Did the universe plan this? Why squelch all my shopping moments...I work three jobs, pay taxes, and just donated to MPR. It is an inconvenience to someone such as me, who uses all features of an iPhone for work, plus the thing had my contacts and passwords etc. Damn it.
I drove straight to AT&T in Mt. Iron and spoke with the agent who told me I needed my four-digit password for AT&T and my Apple watch in order to get into my account. So, I drove all the way back to Soudan, picked up my old Rolodex with the yellowing cards with passwords and codes, grabbed the Apple watch, gulped down a few spoonfuls of honey yogurt and buzzed back to AT&T.
Driving around without my phone made me feel insecure and I started imagining getting a flat tire and some creep pulling over to help...who’d hit me over the head with a hammer, rob me, probably skip the rape... then dump my aging hippie carcass into a swamp somewhere.
How exhausting, and I didn’t want to eat because that would make me tired, so I got by on a bag of mixed nuts and that yogurt throughout the day.
When I got back to AT&T, I had my favorite agent Kris to work with, and I quickly explained my unfortunate situation. Kris was impressed to see the vintage rolodex exclaiming, “Wow, you actually still have one of these?” I said, “Yes, and at times like this you can see why everyone should.” It had my AT&T four-digit passcode, and my Apple ID too, so he was able to use my Apple watch and “ping” my phone, which was still in the Duluth Mall!
Oh my, “the thieves hadn’t fled...I thought.” Kris, who is kind, persuasive, and had bought his wife’s diamond at Helzberg, kindly asked a clerk to walk the short distance down the mall where my phone was discovered pinging on the floor under a shelf of leggings where it had fallen and tumbled out of view.
Well, I was just delighted, so with newfound energy, I decided to drive back to Duluth and get it. By this time, I was feeling a little bit like I was in the twilight zone, and I was wondering what lessons in this definite goose chase were to be learned? I went back to Art in the Alley where shift change had occurred, and a young clerk said that a person from AT&T took the phone because it was pinging.
“What the heck?” I thought, and briskly walked to the AT&T store nearby,where the store agents said they had not had any phones turned in that day.
I was getting really annoyed as they sent me to another AT&T store in the central entrance location. No luck there either, so I had an agent call the rest of the Duluth locations. Nothing came up, so I had the agent there “ping” my watch and it was still at the store in the mall.
So now, the small group of us working on the project thought the store clerk may be lying.....so I was ready to bring in mall security.
I drove quickly back to the mall, and with the new skill of “pinging” learned, I strode in.... shoulders squared back, chin jutted out and “pinging” the entire time.
As I walked past Helzberg Jewelry with a fixed gaze and a growling stomach, a jewelry clerk called out, “Is that you pinging for your watch?” Immediately I softened, pulled in my dagger, and relaxed my chin. I stopped, turned, and like a docile Tupperware lady from the 1950s, smiled with eyes wide and strode into Helzberg.
Inside, I felt pretty cheap having been mentally accusing people of thievery when it was not the case. I simply had lost it, and those sorts of things happen, but what a wild goose chase. I drove immediately to Chick-Fil-A, then hit Kohls for a quick blast of retail revenge therapy and got home after dark.